Stitous?

Ok, now, I'm not one for curses....

(Sidenote:  And I am taking responsibility, and it is up to me to get rid of the curse that hit Meredith, with my car.  I'm not superstitious, but I am a little stitous.)

Let me tell you a brief timeline of my car - Henry the Honda's - life story.  Forgive me, the exact dates are not available.

--Late 2004-Early 2005:  Henry the Honda, a blue 2005 Honda Accord, is born and comes to America

--June 2005:  I go to a car facility to buy a blue Honda Accord.  However, as my family and I are in the car dealership, the car I was buying is being run into by another car in the lot of Schaumburg Honda by a Schaumburg Honda employee.  So, I ended up having to go to another car facility to get Henry.  Fate.

--August 2005:  I go to a party at a coworker's apartment in Chicago.  As I am leaving, I see Henry, parked on the street, with another car parked up against, pressing into the bumper.  As I move it, there is a visible dent.  I have an eyewitness.  I go to the Chicago Police, file a report, etc.  The next day, the damage is not visible.  

--October 2005:  Henry and I get in a minor accident during rushhour (status pending)

--January 2007:  Car accident - another car passing on the shoulder of the road sideswipes me.  I got the license plate, however, the other driver was uncooperative with her insurance and the police.  Eventually, her insurance took responsibility and paid for the repairs (after over a month of frustrations).

--September 2007:  Henry, while parked on the street, is scratched on the side in what is presumed to be a hit and run accident.  Large white scratch on the side.

--October 2007:  Henry and I are hit by a driver trying to cross Addison.  Driver and her insurance accept responsibility and pay for the repairs.  This driver hit right into the scratched area, so the scratch subsequently is repaired.

--December 2007:  Henry's side is dented in yet another hit and run while being parked on the street.  Large size dent - friends comment on said dent.

--Summer 2008:  Dent seems to have 'melted out' of the car.  This is my theory.  Kind of like the previous summer incident - I (very non-scientifically) believe the dent disappeared via humidity.   That, or someone repaired my car when I wasn't looking.  You decide which is more likely.

Have you ever met such a young car with such an extensive resume of repairs?  I probably couldn't sell him for half his blue book value.  He must secretly love me so very much that he wants to be with me so bad - he has done what it takes to make sure that I can't sell him.  Also, every time something happens, he seems to find away to fix himself.  How many people can boast of having a car that fixes itself?  Sigh.  

Henry truly is my miracle baby.

The Secret - A Followup

This woman above is Rhonda Byrne, the author of "The Secret" - a New York Times bestseller endorsed by Oprah, Ellen DeGeneres, Larry King, etc. Not to judge a book by its cover (pardon the pun), but, well....

Ok, here's the deal:

1) A ton of people bought this book

2) If one goes to Amazon.com, a ton of people positively reviewed this book

3) Some influential, powerful, successful people have endorsed this book

(I think maybe all of the above should also check out "The Emperor's New Clothes" - but that's a whole different story. Why yes, I will go on with ridiculous puns FOREVER.)

A brief synopsis - and it hurts my head to even think back to this book - "The Secret" reference is the law of attraction. Like attracts like. With a loose interpretation (I am a liberal, after all), she possibly could be on to something. Positive people seem to attract other positive happy people and perhaps maybe a little extra good fortune - maybe a if one is really friendly, polite and perky, the barista will slip you a free cookie.

To take it a little further - maybe having a certain mindset does subconsciously affect our actions. Example: someone who strongly thinks "I am losing weight" will use this as a point of reference when it comes time to make a decision: Should I wake up a little early to work out? Yes, because I am losing weight!

However, Byrne does not take on a loose interpretation - no, not at all. She takes on a ridiculously strict interpretation. The law of attraction is pretty much failproof in her book - if you put yourself in a certain mindset - you absolutely most certainly will achieve exactly what you want, no two ways about it. Why yes, we really do have the much control over not only our lives but also the entire world!

The book is then peppered with some ludicrous examples (a man who would write himself fake checks every night, then real checks started arriving in the mail) and some desperate but necessary attempts to cover her ass - if you think something and it doesn't happen, you must not have been thinking it strong enough; if something bad happens to you, you must have been thinking it in the back of your head, EVEN IF YOU DIDN'T REALIZE IT.

I'm not going to dedicate much time to going over the obvious holes in this theory - what if I am going up against another person for a job - and we're both using the secret! What happens then? There wasn't a chapter about the secret's method of tie-breaking (this reminds me of in Bruce Almighty, when everyone won the lottery - $17 apiece!). What if a baby is born with, say, fetal alcohol syndrome? Was the baby thinking it on itself? Do babies even think?

I hate hate HATED this book. Although, as I mentioned earlier, it may have had some merits if it hadn't gone so far - this book was simply insulting to the intelligence of any adult of sound mind and body. The false guarantees she promises, the 'blame the victim' mentality - how desperate and hopeless does one have to be to believe this?

HOWEVER.

See my points 1, 2 and 3 above. People bought it and bought into it like mad. Is this a statement about our society? Are we in a place where we've become so desperate and pathetic to believe almost anything? (What's ironic is this book implies we can bring health, wealth, and happiness upon ourselves so easily - yet as this book's popularity soared, well, look at what's happened to the state of America's economy, etc. How come that positive thinking that this book recommended hasn't brought peace and prosperity?)

Anyhow - this book and the phenomenon surrounding it has raised several questions for me - how desperate are we for a quick fix? What can prevent us from buying into basically anything and everything these ridiculous self-help gurus are selling? Will we believe anything we want to?

Thoughts?

Appreciation

I just wanted to give a quick shoutout to my loyal and semi-regular readers - Marcia, Emily, Ana, Jessica, Jeannine, Rachel, Angelique, Ashley, Matt, Tom, Emily's friend Kevin, Mrs. Perv - you are all appreciated. Your clicking the ads on my blog is even more appreciated. I really hope I'm not missing anyone. You are all loved.

Please comment. Please recruit.

Nerds!

Ok, so as my readers probably realize - I own a lot of books.  In case I haven't mentioned it before, this is because at the Sun-Times, every couple months we have 'booksales' with brand new hardcovers for $1 each.  It's a really well-loved employee perk - the inside of a booksale looks much like the Filene's Basement wedding dress sale.  

Anyhow, I was just looking over a book I snatched about four months ago - "Nerds:  Who They Are and Why We Need More of Them", by Dr. David Anderegg.  The first line of the book description is "Are you socially awkward?".  How could one not be intrigued?

Anyhow, I haven't read the book yet, but in the brief description, he defines nerds (those who are technologically and academically advanced or passionate about niche subjects) and how the social stigma and stereotype we have associated with them is potentially greatly affecting our society.

It sounds kind of quirky at a first glance, however - as children begin to discover what it means to be a "nerd", does this affect their academic performance and discourage them from getting involved in certain interests?  On a larger level - this could possibly affect us in a competitive global economy!  International math and science testing shows American teens coming in 24th place amongst the world's most developed nations.   There have been a lot of studies looking in to why American teens don't do better, considering our quality of life and quality of education available.  I think this man could be on to something!

He also raises the idea that we may be affected by certain social stereotypes long after we should know better.  I find this interesting because in a previous blog about another book - I noticed a lot of famous and successful women milling over their childhood unpopularity - it seemed interesting to me that people in their shoes could be stuck on something so seemingly trivial.  I even raised the question - are nerds the ones ruling the world?  Are they (painfully ironically) not smart enough to realize that their own nerdiness is a good thing?

America - we need to re-market the nerd for our own good! 

I cannot wait to start reading this book.   And I, for one, fully embrace the nerdiness associated with being interested in reading about nerds.  

TBS - You Suck!

Just fyi - I want to take a moment to bitch about something.  So, you all know, I love the TBS show "My Boys".  Well, there are commercial on TBS constantly about how 'if you miss an episode, you can catch them on TBS.com'....well, NO.  You can't!  NOT IF YOU OWN AN APPLE!

Let me tell you, it took a lot of googling, installing unnecessary software, and even getting help from the apple store employees to lead to one conclusion - TBS.com is NOT apple friendly!  

GRR.  Doesn't TBS realize in the year 2008, Apple is supposed to own 20% of the computer market (one if its highest shares ever!)?  Do TBS.com's advertisers realize they are missing a very important segment of the market?!?!  I HOPE THEY DO!  Other sites such as NBC.com are not apple unfriendly.  

TBS.com - Fix this problem!!!!

Dianetics

So I think the Chicago Dianetics Center is stalking me.  I know it sounds absurd, but last time I blogged about them, I swear, five minutes after I hit publish for said post, I got a gmail notification - it was another e-mail from THEM!

I dismissed this as a coincidence (is there such a thing as a coincidence though???).  However, very recently, I received yet another e-mail from them.

Subject line:  How to Live With Children

This settles it.  The Chicago Dianetics Center (which is not in Chicago, by the way) must know exactly how I feel about children!!!

Chicago Dianetics Center - you best watch out.  Two words:  restraining order.  You're on my list (along with Marlo Thomas for St. Jude's Hospital).  

Riddle

Q:  How many roommates does it take to change a lightbulb?

A:  2

Q:  How long does it take said roommates to change said bulb?

A:  45 minutes

Perhaps...

...I should come up with a new topic to blog about, so I can stop getting dating site ads all over my blog.  I dunno what sparked the all the marriage and dating posts lately.  Hmm.  It's almost as bad as all the political ones about a month and a half ago.  

Love and Marriage

So, my good friend Matt and I have been having some back-and-forth blogging on the subject of marriage and dating.  Although I don't agree with all of his points, I thought he had a very interesting one:  

Marriage is a lot more than a piece of paper, double income and easily accessible sex. Our culture has just tried to dilute it down to that.

Interesting point, Matthew (who, for the record, is married).

This raises quite a few questions in my mind - what are the pros of being married (as opposed to living with someone or being in a serious relationship - not as opposed to being single)?  Have we lost sight of these pros?  Do these pros outweigh the potential cons of being married?

I'll try to weigh in my opinions...after I get some feedback.  :)

Dating, Part Deux?

Ok, so since I last blogged about dating, one of the ads that showed up on the bottom of my site read:

plentyoffish.com

We delete members unfit to date!

Now, praytell, what makes one 'unfit to date'?  Don't get me wrong, I know what makes one unfit to date (controlling, still in love with an ex, commitment phobic, selfish, sadistic, immature, stop me before I go on forever).   

Now, someone with more experience than me feel free to correct me if I'm wrong, I don't have any experience with dating sites (and I'm not saying this to try to sound cool) - but is there anything one could say about oneself in a self-created dating profile that would indicate one is 'undateable'?   What, in their book, red-flags someone?  I can only assume one wouldn't describe oneself as immature, selfish, etc. 

I guess what amuses me most - maybe this site is trying to publicize itself as having a high quality of people on it - however, I do think this campaign might hurt it a little.   I think some people who have turned to online dating like not having a to deal with facing rejection.  Or, at least the sting of rejection is somewhat subdued seeing that it happens in cyberspace.  

I would think one who seriously fears rejection would be afraid of trying said site.   How bad would it feel to be rejected by a dating site?   It's not that one person doesn't want to date you, the entire dating community doesn't want to have you!

Conversely - I think the commercials for the chemistry.com website, which spoke about how they don't reject anyone but eharmony sent these seemingly normal, attractive, successful people "Dear John" letters, really hit the nail on the head for those who fear rejection.   I guess though, sites like these that don't reject anyone can boast they are carrying any and every weirdo out there.  

Thoughts?

Dating

So, now, is it just me, or isn't dating one of the most awkward things out there?  Aren't first dates just the worst? Now, I'm not saying that I don't like dating.  It's fine once things get comfortable.  It's a necessary evil to finding happiness.  However - a friend of mine and I were discussing some dilemmas.

What if, on a first date, one is to see a movie?   A BAD movie.... Afterwards, there's always some compulsion to talk about the movie.  What's one to say?  Especially if the other person either treated for the movie or merely suggested the movie...does it look ungrateful to say "that was the WORST movie I've ever seen!"  Does it sound like one is having a bad time?  I would think, then, the inviter would feel awkwardly guilty.  He or she might feel compelled to apologize, even though, hopefully, it was completely unintentional.  Come to think of it, I can think of a couple movies that I'd like show to some of my worst enemies while they are tied down in a room alone in front of a tv.  

However, if one hates the movie, but, to seem nice and grateful and pleasant, says "it was pretty good" - it might come off as though this person has bad taste in movies.  If I were to see a God-awful movie with someone I don't know all that well and he were to say he liked it - I'd definitely think 'no way.  there's no way I can put of with this for the next however many years of my life'.  Also, if both parties hate the movie - then there's something to bond about - similar taste - however, there are risks of coming off a certain way if one is too honest.  Is it better to be honest and seem like a jerk with good taste, or to be a nice person with bad taste?   Which kind of person is worse to date?

I know some people will simply say a movie is not a good choice for a first date (you don't get to talk much to actually get to know each other).  However, I kind of think the same goes for other kinds of dates - like if you go out for a dinner and it ends up that you don't like what you ordered (or don't like the restaurant).  If you choke it down and say it's good - you run the risk of "I know!! I LOVE this place.  I come here all the time - let's come back next week!!"  What does one do?  Should she (or he) be blatantly honest?

Sigh.   

F*R*I*E*N*D*S?

So there's some quiz circulating the internet/facebook/etc. - "Which Friends character are you?"

I think I took it and it declared me Rachel.  Now, not that I have any beefs with that.  However,  I think it's blatantly clear which Friends character I am.

"I'm not so good with the advice...can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?"