Shoes, Shoes, Shoes

While we're on the subject of Sex and the City, this reminds me of one of my favorite episodes.  Holler if you know it offhand!

Going Back to My Roots

Remember when this blog used to have a ton of Sex and the City, Seinfeld, and Friends quotes?  Remember when this blog was updated fairly regularly?  Yeah, I know.

I thought I'd go back to the good old days.  I came across this one.  And I LOVE it.  It's definitely how I feel.

“I am someone who is  looking for love. Real love. Ridiculous, inconvenient, consuming, can’t-live-without-each-other love.”

Testing A Theory?

Carrie: You said you were a Stewardess?
Miranda: I was testing a theory.
Carrie: A theory being?
Miranda: That men are threatened by powerful jobs. They don't want a lawyer, they want...Aiden: A liar!
Miranda: I'm just saying as a lawyer, a partner no less, I got zero dates and as a stewardess, I got one for tomorrow night.
Carrie: I believe the correct term is flight attendant.
Miranda: Not if you wanna get laid.

I heard the other day on Eric & Kathy that there's some truth to this - that women who are in traditionally lucrative careers (such as doctors and lawyers) and single have quite a hard time getting dates because men are (sometimes even openly) intimidated by them.  


This makes me sad.  I hope this isn't true, or, at least, gets phased out soon.  Women - what have been your experiences?   Is it better to 'lie down' whilst trying to date man?  No, not in that way.  Get your mind out of the gutter.  Is the job for pun-writer on Sex and the City still available?

Irony Alert

The other day, I was discussing Sex and the City with a good friend.  I made reference to this quote:

Carrie Bradshaw:  We are so over, we need a new word for over.

She says this to Big.

In season 3.

Yep.

********************************

That leads me to a question - whenever someone declares she is "so done with 'xyz'", is it EVER true?!  The fact that the person is consciously making a statement on the matter is very telling, in my opinion.  Remember when Nicole Richie said she was done with Paris Hilton, ending it with the every cryptic 'Paris knows what she's done', then a couple months later they were out shopping together or something?   When is some event or person truly 'over'?  I don't really know, but I do know that when someone is talking about said event or person, they surely aren't yet.  Agree?  Disagree?  Your thoughts?

Back to a Sex and the City-ism

The other day, one of my all-time favorite websites, facebook, was hosting a poll:  who is your favorite Sex and the City boyfriend?

The options were:

--Big

--Aiden

--Steve

--Richard

--Trey

Uh, duh!

No contest.  Steve wins hands down in my book.  Even considering his error in judgment from the first SATC movie - I still forgave him (and at least he did take responsibility for the mistake).  I think he's a genuine guy, he's cute (in a dorky way), he's good for Miranda, and he sincerely cares about her.   I'd date him.

Mr. Big is much more refined and charming (and maybe even better looking), but there was a small part of him that never seemed to be fully into Carrie.  Carrie was running around chasing him, wanting him to love her for a big portion of the series.   It wasn't until the last season that he was good for her.  So, on these grounds, he cannot win in my book.

Aiden was never the right match for Carrie.  He was just so blatantly wrong for her the whole time - although he seemed like a good guy, I could never vote for him.  Maybe if he was cast as Carrie's brother or contractor, I'd see him in a different light.

I have no idea how Richard or Trey even found themselves on this list.  It should have been Smith and Harry instead.  But I digress.

Who is your favorite SATC boyfriend?  Anyone else share my love of Steve?   Do you all feel Big is better (it looked like he won the facebook poll).  Your thoughts?

A Sex in the City Quote to Break Up Some Monotony

Think about it. If you are single, after graduation there isn't one occasion where people celebrate you. ... Hallmark doesn't make a "congratulations, you didn't marry the wrong guy" card. And where's the flatware for going on vacation alone?

Sooooo true!!

Bad Dates.

So, as the 'Carrie Bradshaw', if you will, I go out on a lot of dates.  Some good.  Some really, really not.  A lot of my friends hear the noteworthy stories.  Like the guy who told me there was a woman who kept contacting him, offering to pay him to have sex with her.  I'm guessing he must have thought this made him look more appealing.

I know the single men probably have a list of grievances about things women do 'wrong' on dates.

I can tell you, confidently, that I was (at least) once 'the bad date'.

Long story short.  It was a first date.  He offered to take me out for tapas downtown, around 7:30ish (after work for him).  Well, I got off work at 5, so instead of going home, then coming all the way back downtown, I decided to grab a drink with some coworkers.  Well, my coworkers chose this Mexican restaurant with margaritas as big as one's head.  Well, $12 later, I'm sure going to get my money's worth.  Anyhow.  Then I move along to meet my date for dinner.

Well, at the restaurant, they're running a little behind, so my date suggests we grab some sangria at the bar.   At this point, I officially blame my mother for not warning me the risks of mixing alcohol on an empty stomach.

Well, then we sat down at our table and he ordered a pitcher of sangria (maybe I can blame him - he wanted a second drink?  for shame).  At this point, I thought I was doing ok, but then my words started to get away from me.  Or run together.  Or something.  I was glad it was a seated dinner because standing was challenging.  And the room began spinning.  Well, I kind of leaned back in my chair and let him lead the conversation.  I thought I'd be ok, quickly thereafter, I found myself dashing for the restroom, for the alcohol was doing what alcohol sometimes does.  I got back and played it off casually, however, I then did the exact same thing twice more in the next hour, so I think he was on to me.

Anyhow.  Is it bad form to get falling down drunk on a first date?  Do guys typically get offended by this?  Anyhow, my date and I ended up going out again, so he clearly wasn't too perturbed.   I always wondered if he noticed that I was drunk and was just too polite to call me out on it, or if it somehow possibly escaped him.

Has anyone else ever been the bad date?  Am I the bad date more often than I realize?  Your thoughts?

It's Been a While since We've Had a Sex and the City Quote

I was looking for a good one.  I ironically came across this winner:

"Every girlfriend I've had wants me to change something.  Change your friends.  Change your job.  Change your attitude.  The only thing I change is girlfriends."  (random guy)

I kind of like this.  I don't think we, as people, should change for anyone (not just my women - men too).  I'm almost inclined to say 'you go, boy!'  The relationship we have with ourselves is the one to which we should be most loyal.

I know several friends that have dated guys that they have viewed as a 'work in progress'.  Some of them successfully molded these men, others - not so much.  I, personally, do not have the energy.  I can also think of a male coworker who once explained that it took him a while to realize it, but his first wife wasn't necessarily as in love with him as she was with the man she had all along been trying to make him into (and note the word 'first' preceding wife).   Anyhow.

I personally just don't have the energy to try to shape a guy.  I want one ready-made, the way I want.  Maybe that explains my singlehood.  Hmm.

My All-Time Favorite Sex and the City Quote

“Uh huh. Most women aren't angry, irrational psychos. We just want an ending to a relationship that... That is thoughtful and decent and honors what we had together. So my point, Billy, is this; There is a good way to break-up with someone, And it doesn't include a post-it!”- Carrie

There's definite truth to this.  Not just the post-it part.  That, and I know, firsthand, that I have been the angry, irrational psycho.  I think it's a sign of truly caring.  

Engagements.

So recently, one of my good friends got engaged.  I am very happy for her - her fiance is a very nice, respectful person.  She is excited to register.

Let me revisit this one.  Why can't I, or others, pull this one?

Hi.  It's Carrie Bradshaw.  I wanted to let you know that I'm getting married.  To myself.  Oh, and I'm registered at Manolo Blahnik.  So thanks.  Bye!

Why not?

Sex and the City Quote of the Day

“When men attempt bold gestures, generally it's considered romantic. When women do it, it's often considered desperate or psychotic.” - Carrie

I TOTALLY agree. 

Sex and the City Quote of the Day

“Think about it. If you are single, after graduation there isn’t one occasion where people celebrate you … Hallmark doesn’t make a “congratulations, you didn’t marry the wrong guy” card. And where’s the flatware for going on vacation alone?" -Carrie Bradshaw

 Amen.

Currently Reading....

Really good.   About 40 pages in already.

However (spoiler alert?).

I get picky when there are inconsistencies between a book and a series.  I do realize Candace wrote the first book that started SATC but didn't write every episode from there on out (I assume).  However - in the series, I believe it's Season 4, the episode entitled 'Shoulda Woulda Coulda' - Carrie comments that her dad ran out on her and her mom at age 5 (or sometime around there).  In this book - Carrie is in high school and her dad is still around.

Also, Carrie has siblings in this book.  Nothing was ever said that Carrie had siblings during the entire series.  Granted, there was no mention of family, in general, for her.  I realize that doesn't mean they couldn't have existed, however, with so much focus on her for so long, I feel, if they did exist, they should have been thrown in to a conversation or episode at some point.  I had Carrie pegged as an only like me, for multiple reasons, and I had all the supporting evidence I needed.  Or, at least, no contradictory evidence.  Hmm.  Sigh.

Your thoughts?  Who else is reading this?

I Own These....

The fact is, sometimes it's really hard to walk in a single woman's shoes. That's why we need really special ones now and then to make the walk a little more fun.  - Carrie Bradshaw, Season 6, 'A Woman's Right to Shoes'

(I have come so far since the Ladybug shoes (featured on April 5, 2010).)

The Scrunchie

Ok - who remembers the scrunchie?!

Today a good friend of mine brought up the subject of the scrunchie, and the fact that she used to make them.  OMG, ME TOO.

That, and I seriously loved scrunchies.  The odd, complex thing about it, though, was I didn't like the way my hair looked up in them.  But I liked them.  I liked the fancy beautiful hair decorations.  It just didn't work when I tried to wear them.  Quite a conundrum.

Anyhow.  The scrunchie is now out.   As in, out of style.  It is so officially out of style, it was even mentioned as being out on Sex and the City years ago (when her toolish ex-boyfriend Jack Berger who was so much hotter as Peter Gibbons foolishly states that a New York woman might wear one and Carrie immediately corrects it).

Will the scrunchie come back?  Will it be revived?  Can it come back from the aforementioned PR disaster?  (If so, then what about banana clips?)  Are there closet scrunchie enthusiasts out there?  Is it a secret cult classic (like, say, "My So-Called Life")?  Who coined the term 'scrunchie'?  When was the last time, you, reader, saw someone wearing one?

Sex and the City 2

Say what you will.

I CANNOT WAIT.

I've been watching the first movie, repeatedly, in prep for it.

Busy Busy

Carrie Bradshaw to the random businessman who bumps her on the street:
You're so busy...you're SO busy!!!

Is it just me, or does it drive any of my readers nuts when people constantly complain on how incredibly busy they are?  What is this, an epidemic lately?  The reason it bothers me is not I don't believe these people are busy, it's that, newsflash, WE ALL ARE.  In theory, if 'busy' is an acceptable excuse for having not done something, then EVERYONE could use it for EVERYTHING.

That, and people who actually are busy don't need to say it.  You had a baby last week?  Yeah, you're probably busy.  You don't need to explain it.  And THESE people usually don't.  I hate it when you ask someone a simple, reasonable request and they give you a dissertation on everything they've been up to lately - in the amount of time he or she spent making him or herself look/sound important, he or she could have instead performed said task.  That, and some of these 'busy' folks have simply overcommitted themselves.  Not that that's a crime, but again, that was said individual's decision.  Didn't you know what you were getting into when you volunteered for 85 different projects?

That, and this reminds of an episode of Oprah (I know, blush) where they staged interventions on people who were hiding from reality in what seemed to be socially acceptable outlets.  There was a woman who worked 110 hours a week at 3 separate jobs.  She made it out that she was trying to make the extra money to support her family, but according to her husband, they didn't really need it to live comfortably. In reality, she was avoiding her home because she was unhappy in her marriage and constantly arguing with her kids.  Had she chosen to deal with this problem by say, drugs or alcohol, people would have been all over her from the get-go, however, since she was hiding from her life in a 'socially acceptable' outlet, people who knew her looked the other way.  I think this is probably the case of a couple 'constantly super busy' people I know.  Not that they're unhappy with their marriages/kids, but that they're just making themselves busy as a means of avoiding dealing with something.

Sorry for the rant.  I am not really sure where this came from.

Breaking Up is Hard to do....

So I was reading Cosmo (yep, again) - the guy confession page. One guy wrote in - here's a brief synopsis of his story:

He met a girl, they went out a couple times, he realized he wasn't into her. He stopped calling/texting, however, she continued to call/text him and he couldn't seem to shake her (editor's sidenote: I, personally, am disappointed he didn't mention whether or not he'd slept with her - I feel it was an important detail). He decided to create an email account, emailed this girl pretending to be his own mother, and told her (as his 'mother') that her son had had a mental breakdown and had been institutionalized, therefore, he couldn't see her any more.

(Second editor's sidenote: I wonder if he realizes this really isn't, in all actuality, all that far from the truth.)

Ok - first - just to clarify - I personally have not been in a relationship recently, nor have I been broken up with recently. In fact, not in years. I say this so no one thinks I'm some bitter crazy angry girl who is pissed off at her recent ex-boyfriend or something that implies there is such an undertone to this post.

Second. Seriously dude? Couldn't you have, uh, just told her the truth (or a gentle reasonable facsimile)? 'I realized I'm still not over my ex....I am just not ready for a relationship right now....I don't think we want the same things' yada? In addition to this, I have known quite a few various guys who've used some bizarre breakup techniques - such as disappearing, or purposely intentionally pissing the girl off so she will break up with him. What is with guys fearing girls will go CRAZY if they tell them honestly, respectfully that they just don't think things are going to work out?

I know a lot of guys will interject that girls they've had past experiences with did go crazy, so they've taken to erring on the side of caution. However, I think the anger really just comes not from the rejection necessarily but in the way that it's handled. In the words of Carrie Bradshaw, from the best SATC episode ever:

"Most women aren't angry, irrational psychos. We just want an ending to a relationship that is thoughtful and decent and honors what we had together. So my point, Billy, is this. There is a good way to break-up with someone and it doesn't include a post-it!"

Your thoughts? Do all men have issues in breaking up with women? Do women have similar issues when breaking up with men? Is there any good way to break up with a person? Anyone have any major horror stories out there? In the minds of men, do all women have the potential to get crazy when they're being broken up with?

Sex in the City, in the City

Where Carrie and Big first met....


Where they were supposed to marry....


Miranda: But if one of us decides not to show, we're rejected and standing on a bridge.



Where Carrie and Miranda stalked Big and his mom in the first season.

Some More Thoughts on Sex and the City and Fate, Etc.

Carrie Bradshaw: I got to thinking about fate. That crazy concept that we're not really responsible for the course our lives take. That it's all predestined, written in the stars. Maybe that explains why, if you live in a city, where you can't even see the stars, your love life tends to feel a little more random. And even if our every man, every kiss, every heartache, is pre-ordered from some cosmic catalogue, can we still take a wrong step and wander off our own personal milky way? I couldn't help but wonder, can you make a mistake and miss your fate?

Now, this was a lovely episode and all(the one where Miranda has Brady and Mr. Big moves halfway across the country) - it raises an interesting point - can we, somehow, screw up our fate? There's a nice, sweet, charming quote at the end of it:

Maybe our mistakes are what make our fate. Without them, what would shape our lives? Perhaps if we never veered off course we wouldn't fall in love, or have babies, or be who we are. After all, seasons change. So do cites. People come into your life and people go. But it's comforting to know that the ones you love are always in your heart. And if you're very lucky, a plane ride away.

Anyhow.

This raises an interesting question - is it possible to 'miss your fate'? I know my spiritual friends will say no. I know my more scientific friends will say there is no such thing as fate. I probably fall somewhere into a 'middle ground' when it comes to spiritual vs. scientific.

Some people say 'what's meant for you won't miss you'. I am not sure what I believe on this one. However, I can think of four instances in my life where, ironically, it seemed like things were just meant to work out a certain way, against all odds. I'll go as far to say I can think of four instances where I ALMOST screwed up my fate, but for whatever reason, things worked out the way they did anyway.

However, according to this way of thinking, it's almost as though one is just supposed to sit back and wait for fate to happen to him/her. I believe in being proactive about things. I do believe that when a person really wants something, it's up to him or her to go out and make it happen. I kind of feel the whole 'fate' concept sometimes kind of contradicts this. Hmm.

Thoughts? Is there such a thing as fate? Is it possible to screw up one's fate? Can anything be done to alter fate?