Online Dating Commercials

Whenever I'm watching a TV show and dating website advertisement comes on, I feel compelled to change the channel.  Not because I don't want to look at the dating website ad, but because I feel like I must be watching something shameful.  Like, the media buyer who bought this ad space must have viewed the typical demographic for said show as sad and lonely and on the edge - like I imagine those watching QVC at 9:00PM on a Saturday night in pajamas with a cookie dough roll in one's hand to be.  These people are on the verge of asking themselves "what the hell am I doing right now?  somebody help me!"  Enter the eharmony commercial.  So whenever I see and e-harm or match commercial come on, I'm tempted to jump for the clicker - not because I think there's anything wrong with online dating (cough, cough), but because it makes me think something's wrong with THIS SHOW.  

Tais Til 4 is My Friend

So, as a good amount of my readers know, I am the kind of gal who enjoys a night on the town with a couple libations.  However, all good things, at times, possess some negative qualities.

One of my main complaints about alcohol is the fact that it makes me have to pee quite often.  I know this is not an uncommon complaint about liquor.  I guess, moreso, my issue is that, often times when I've had a couple and have to pee, I don't realize it until there's an extreme sense of urgency in the matter.  I don't know if it has something to do with alcohol impairing one's judgment, or alcohol slowing one's reactions, or something else entirely, but I do think it's worthwhile that scientists might but some time and money into researching this pressing matter.

Anyhow.  I can think of one particular instance this got me into a little bit of trouble.  I ended up going out for byob sushi with three other ladies.  I love byobs because, unlike in the aforementioned post, I know I'm not getting ripped off on alcohol.  It's easy to coordinate with friends to rotate bringing a bottle to share.  On this particular night, we four girls ended up bringing four bottles.

So, we sat and drank four bottles over a period of a couple hours whilst consuming some delicious sushi.  I remember making one rest stop whilst at the restaurant (as the Monday morning quarterback, I keep going over this in my head).

After we finished our food and wine, we decided to meet up with a friend who is a bartender at a local pub.  This is dangerous because we got free drinks.  Again, it wasn't the liquor content that ultimately ended up being the problem, but rather, the liquid content over the beverage.  Who knew?

Anyhow, after a short period of time, we all decided it was time to call it a night and go our separate ways.  I jumped in to a cab.  Approximately right after I sat down in said taxi, I realized the little problem I had at hand.  I had to pee.  I was in Wicker Park, on my way back to Lakeview.  Ok, it's all right, I'm on my way back home - I'll be there shortly.

Well, upon being in said taxi for about two minutes, I realized the issue was a little more, err, pressing than I realized.  I tried to distract myself by texting with my phone, but it soon became uncomfortable to sit in any position because my oversized bladder was now the size of a small child inside me.

Somewhere along Ashland Avenue, I came to the realization that I wasn't going to make it.   I was in too much physical pain.  I had only been in the cab around 7 min, but I realized it would be at least another 3 min before I got home, and that was too much.  I wasn't sure what to do.

Apparently, the cab driver was on to the fact that there was a problem as well - most likely because I was unconsciously whimpering.  "Are you ok, ma'am?"  It was so sweet of him to be concerned - I let the 'ma'am' go.  I frantically looked around.  Nearby, there was a bar called 'Tais Til 4'.  Prior to this night, I was not very familiar with Tais Til 4.  However, upon initial viewing, it looked like the kind of bar that might let a girl fly in, use the bathroom, and fly out.

"Uh, actually, can you stop right here?"  I paid the cabbie.  I don't remember if they checked my ID at the door.  I made a beeline for the ladies room.  Thank goodness there was no line.  This might have been because, I believe at the time, I was the only female in said place.

The bathroom was shockingly clean.  I instantly felt so much better - that was, for a second, until I realized I had to do 'the walk of shame'.  Based on the layout of the bar, my straight shot from the door to the washroom was witnessed by the four 'truck driver-esque' gentlemen at the bar, plus the bartender (my real concern - perhaps this kind of patronage is frowned upon by employees).  I emerged slowly.  Sure enough, they were all staring at me.

"Uhh."  I was trying to debate my strategy.  Do I bolt?  Do I pretend I'm looking for a friend in the back room?  Do I stand there and text and look busy?   At this point, the individuals at the bar were cracking up.

"It's ok, you can come in here and use our washroom."  I wasn't sure if the bartender was joking or being serious, but he was laughing, so I took it he wasn't too mad.  I took out a couple singles, plunked it down on the bar, proclaimed "I'm sure you're a great bartender.  Thank you." (which was met with more laughter from the peanut gallery) and high-tailed it out of there.  I have never spent a considerable amount of time in Tais Til 4, but after this pleasant experience, I am tempted to go back.  And not just for a rest stop.

Thank you, Tais and the kind cab driver, for being there for me.

Half Full or Half Empty?

So the other night, on one of my most recent dating excursions, I was at an upscale sushi restaurant downtown.  I went to order a glass of wine - a $10 glass of wine, if you will.

They brought it to me in a very large wine glass.  It looked as though there was 1 inch deep of liquid in said glass.  This did not seem adequate to me for a 'glass of wine' (please don't try to send me to AA).  

I commented on this to my date.  He agreed that the height of it didn't seem that great, but to consider the width.  I worried that this line came too easily to him.

Now, at the end of the day, I'm going to give said restaurant the benefit of the doubt that they gave me a full glass of wine and that this was just an optical illusion (my date treated so I'm not gonna lose sleep over this).  However, is this a good idea on restaurant's parts?  Shouldn't they be buying small wine glasses, where it actually might look like the patrons are getting a full glass?  Maybe the small glasses would create a better optical illusion?  Or, is there something hoity-toity about large wine glasses and that's why expensive restaurants choose them?   Which kind of wine glasses do you prefer?  Which kind should I buy for my apartment?  Your thoughts?

Back to a Sex and the City-ism

The other day, one of my all-time favorite websites, facebook, was hosting a poll:  who is your favorite Sex and the City boyfriend?

The options were:

--Big

--Aiden

--Steve

--Richard

--Trey

Uh, duh!

No contest.  Steve wins hands down in my book.  Even considering his error in judgment from the first SATC movie - I still forgave him (and at least he did take responsibility for the mistake).  I think he's a genuine guy, he's cute (in a dorky way), he's good for Miranda, and he sincerely cares about her.   I'd date him.

Mr. Big is much more refined and charming (and maybe even better looking), but there was a small part of him that never seemed to be fully into Carrie.  Carrie was running around chasing him, wanting him to love her for a big portion of the series.   It wasn't until the last season that he was good for her.  So, on these grounds, he cannot win in my book.

Aiden was never the right match for Carrie.  He was just so blatantly wrong for her the whole time - although he seemed like a good guy, I could never vote for him.  Maybe if he was cast as Carrie's brother or contractor, I'd see him in a different light.

I have no idea how Richard or Trey even found themselves on this list.  It should have been Smith and Harry instead.  But I digress.

Who is your favorite SATC boyfriend?  Anyone else share my love of Steve?   Do you all feel Big is better (it looked like he won the facebook poll).  Your thoughts?

What Should and Shouldn't be said over E-Mail?

The other day, someone I know told a story about one of her good friends getting dumped by her boyfriend via email.  Said couple had been dating for a couple months.

Now, a mere five years ago, this would have been considered horrific form.  (Some might say it still is.)  However, I will venture an educated guess that things like this taking place over email are not that uncommon.

The question of 'is it ok to break up with someone over email' comes up, naturally.  However, aside from just that - I think a lot of serious personal conversations take place in this medium.   It is a nice easy way to address situations that require some level of confrontation with minimal discomfort for both parties involved.

However, something is obviously lost.  There are several problems - we don't see facial reactions/emotions.  People have time to think about and edit their responses - they can even ask others for input.  Also, there isn't an absolute obligation to respond to an email, whereas with a face-to-face conversation (or even a phone conversation), avoiding responding is much more difficult.  And, perhaps the biggest problem of all - there is a 'forward' button.

However, since so much conversing takes place over email, do almost all important confrontations nowadays take place this way?  Have a lot of personal, important, emotional conversations occurred in this medium?  Is this a good thing?  I'm inclined to say no.  It might seem like an easier way for one to say what he or she needs to say that one might not have the nerve to say to someone in person, several things are definitely lost.

Where is the line drawn of what can and cannot take place over e-mail?   Are all awkward conversations surely migrating over to email?  How does one tell someone it's inappropriate to talk about a certain topic via email?  Your thoughts?

A Sex in the City Quote to Break Up Some Monotony

Think about it. If you are single, after graduation there isn't one occasion where people celebrate you. ... Hallmark doesn't make a "congratulations, you didn't marry the wrong guy" card. And where's the flatware for going on vacation alone?

Sooooo true!!

Online Dating Encounter

So, as I was telling someone about my experience with online dating, I was asked if I ever encountered a weirdo.  My knee-jerk reaction was to say no - the handful of guys I'd met in person were polite and normal.

However, I did remember one odd experience.

There was a guy who winked at me.  I checked out his profile.  It was kind of sarcastic in some respects - I can't remember exactly what he said, in hindsight, but I remember seeing a couple things, such as how he described his job and life and thinking 'uh, that's obviously a joke'.  Anyhow.  He looked like he could be funny and moderately attractive.  I winked back.  I got an email.  Again, I don't remember anything in particular - I think it was something pretty standard like 'you look interesting, we should hang out sometime'.  The day of the email, I felt tired, so I figured I'd respond to it later.  I logged off and went to sleep.  About a day later, before I responded, I got another email.  I was able to located it (thanks Gmail, for saving everything!).

Thanks for blowing me off and getting my hopes up. Why'd you wink at me if you really weren't interested? Let me guess...were you too "busy" to respond?

You must be like all the typically high-maintenance girls who require guys to chase you around mindlessly before you give them the time of day. I have way too much self-respect to play stupid games like that.

Please spare me whatever lame excuse you have for ignoring me because 1) You were online when you got my e-mail so you had the opportunity to respond and 2) I just blocked you.

You blew your only chance with me. I'm getting so fed up with the teasing games you girls play. Don't you realize you're being inconsiderate?

Not interested anymore.




Since, as I mentioned earlier, he was very sarcastic, I wondered if it was part of a joke.  I showed it to a couple of my friends.  "No, he's definitely not joking, he's actually pissed".  I definitely found this odd.  He hadn't spent any money on me or even met me in person, so why would he care so much?  Anyhow, I just didn't respond and never spoke to him again, although he then continued to view my profile religiously.  


Anyhow, I recently told this story to a male acquaintance.  He said he'd heard of other women having similar experiences of men they hardly knew angrily 'bitching them out', if you will, on online dating sites.  I am surprised by this.  I often assume women to be the ones to sooner get angry or confrontational.  However, said male that I spoke with had a theory that there's a pool of men on various online dating sites who've had a bit of, ahem, experience being rejected by women and are very sensitive/angry about it.


Your thoughts?  Women, have any of you had similar experiences?  Is this a typical online dating experience/epidemic?  Men, have you ever gotten so angry at a woman you've never met in real life?  Any other crazy online dating experiences?  Your thoughts?  

Psychos.

As I am about to embark upon internet dating, the concern of potential psychos naturally came up.

There's also the other question - who needs to be more concerned about having a potential psycho on one's hand - women or men?   I know both parties would say themselves.

I think women are typically the ones to do more little crazy things - calling excessively, texting excessively, throwing a drink in one's face, etc.  Men rarely do this stuff.  That being said, I think when it comes to going out with a stranger, women are definitely the ones who have an actual safety concern at hand, whereas men don't really, for all intents and purposes.  That's why I am typically very secretive in my online adventures.  However, that being said, whenever a guy won't give out much information ahead of time, I view it as a red flag (he has something to hide, typically likes to leave the option open of disappearing on girls, etc.).  Whenever I meet a guy and he tells me his ex-girlfriend was 'psycho' - I assume he did something shady and she reacted with the normal human reaction of anger.

I am curious your thoughts.  Male readers (if I have any) - do you have experience with women acting psycho?  Has anyone out there dealt with psycho behavior (stalking?) from men?  Should I be afraid?

National Donut Day

So, today, apparently, is National Donut (doughnut?) Day. (?)

I have never heard of said holiday and never remember it being celebrated in my past 28 years of life.  The donut needs a day?  What about other sweets?  Other foods?  Is this a cue for a Jay Leno joke about America's expanding waistlines?  There surely couldn't be a national asparagus day.

Per Wikipedia, apparently National Doughnut Day is not an entirely new thing.  Why is it suddenly being talked about?  I don't know, but I'll gladly take the freebie I got this morning with my coffee purchase at Dunkin.  Maybe every day should be NDD.

Your thoughts?  Discuss.

A Memo to Victoria's Secret

...it's getting to be too much.

I've gone in a couple different Chicagoland locations recently to shop.  On different days at different levels of crowdedness, I've had virtually the same experience.

The employees have been, pardon me, up my a** like an uncomfortable thong.  I could not take two steps without having been approached to see if I need help.  I must have been approached at least 8 times!  I could not look through unmentionables in peace.  I needed help - I needed employee repellent.

Ok - first off, let me say something:  I get it that it is not the employees' doing.  Either they are a) highly commissioned or b) (as I believe with VS) heavily pressured by the management to approach every guest in sight and reprimanded if they are caught not doing it.   For this reason, I tried to give a polite 'no, thanks', but after a while, it became hard to stop myself from snapping 'get away from me!!!'

Now, also, I get it that a lot of stores have the mentality of 'it's better to have the employees proactively helping the guests' because of suggestive selling, the guests sometimes being timid about asking, etc.  I get that.  But Victoria's Secret has crossed the line and become 'too much'.  I am not sure, exactly, where that line is drawn, but spending 2 minutes in Vicky's makes one realize she is in a place that is over it.  The worst thing is that most things purchased at VS are better purchased in store than online.  Sigh.

So, therefore - my point.  In case there are any Victoria's Secret top executives perusing the blog world looking for feedback/slander about their stores - ease up on getting in your customer's faces, yo.  Thanks for listening.  

A Sex in the City Quote....

...to lighten the mood, and to balance out all the Greg that's been on this blog.

Charlotte:  Sometimes when I'm running, I imagine what I would say to him if I ever saw him again.  I have the perfect opening line.  Do you wanna hear it?  I curse the day you were born.

***********************

I have a good friend who thinks "I curse the day you were born" is the perfect line for telling someone off. Your thoughts?  Has anyone ever told someone this?  

Yet Another Greg Tidbit

Don't be flattered that he misses you.  He  should miss you.  You're deeply missable.  However, he's still the same person who just broke up with you.  Remember, the only reason he can miss you is because he's choosing, every day, not to be with you.