Honesty.

So, I have learned (unfortunately often times the hard way) that there are some honest things that shouldn't be said to friends.

The line that usually gets me in trouble the most is 'your boyfriend sucks'.  My defense is always that I think the guy said friend is with does not treat her the way deserves and/or is not good enough for her, and that I truly believe she can find someone better.  Alas, regardless, trouble usually ensues.

Anyhow.

I have *almost* learned to hold my tongue.  However, I can't help but feel guilty when I'm not being completely honest with a friend.  I feel as though I'm being a bad friend sitting by and watching and not saying anything.  Isn't it the job of a friend to tell the truth, even when it's hard?  I especially feel bad when, hypothetically speaking - let's say a friend breaks up with her boyfriend, and I then say 'it didn't seem right' and she then says 'why didn't you say something?!'    But would she have listened?  Does anyone ever?  On this same note, I do know how I personally feel about unrequested advice on how to live (read: not good).

That being said, I always wonder what people who care about me are thinking but not saying.  A small part of me would love some anonymous blatant honesty - a larger part of me would not.

I also think I'd secretly like to write a post of honest things I'm thinking but I know I shouldn't say, not specifying the individuals they are directed at - however, I also know I'd get myself in a lot of trouble on this one.

Anyhow.  Which is more important in friendship - being honest or respecting someone's feelings?