Honesty.

So, I have learned (unfortunately often times the hard way) that there are some honest things that shouldn't be said to friends.

The line that usually gets me in trouble the most is 'your boyfriend sucks'.  My defense is always that I think the guy said friend is with does not treat her the way deserves and/or is not good enough for her, and that I truly believe she can find someone better.  Alas, regardless, trouble usually ensues.

Anyhow.

I have *almost* learned to hold my tongue.  However, I can't help but feel guilty when I'm not being completely honest with a friend.  I feel as though I'm being a bad friend sitting by and watching and not saying anything.  Isn't it the job of a friend to tell the truth, even when it's hard?  I especially feel bad when, hypothetically speaking - let's say a friend breaks up with her boyfriend, and I then say 'it didn't seem right' and she then says 'why didn't you say something?!'    But would she have listened?  Does anyone ever?  On this same note, I do know how I personally feel about unrequested advice on how to live (read: not good).

That being said, I always wonder what people who care about me are thinking but not saying.  A small part of me would love some anonymous blatant honesty - a larger part of me would not.

I also think I'd secretly like to write a post of honest things I'm thinking but I know I shouldn't say, not specifying the individuals they are directed at - however, I also know I'd get myself in a lot of trouble on this one.

Anyhow.  Which is more important in friendship - being honest or respecting someone's feelings?

I Don't Believe in Love at First Sight....

...but last night, it happened to me.  Yes, a cynic like me.

Halloween Preview.

Pics to come later, for sure.

Happy Halloween!!

AIM High?

For the first time in a very long time, I signed into AIM.

As you'll see above, I found something enjoyable (besides the bunny).

I am on 411 buddy lists.  I have NOWHERE near that amount of buddies.  Who are you, my buddies?  (or bunnies?)  Please come forward. 

This almost makes up for my complete and total lack of followers on twitter.

Abercrombie & Fitch

Whatever happened to Abercrombie & Fitch?  I know the store is still out there because I see it at all the major malls.  Is it still popular?  Is it still expensive?  Is it still making sales despite the economy?  I feel like I don't see their clothes walking around on people much - maybe it's that they changed their style.  Maybe it's that I'm no longer in high school.  I don't know.  Maybe the company was started by some wealthy individual and isn't necessarily intended for profit - someone just enjoys keeping it running, even if it ends up in the red.  Does anyone know?

Another Random Grammatical Pet Peeve

When people say 'minused' instead of subtracted.

I don't know if it's necessarily wrong.

It just irritates me.

Did Anyone See....

The Nightmare on Elm Street remake that was filmed at my very own John Hersey High School?  I remember it hitting the theatres and then not hearing much more of it.   I see it did very well on Rotten Tomatoes.  Anyone have anything to say about it?  Does it coordinate nicely with my impending ten year high school reunion?  Your thoughts?

What is with...

Fantasy football?

It's EVERYWHERE.  Everyone I know plays it.  Girls I know who know nothing about football to begin with.  Why?  Is it just to impress their boyfriends?  Or out of boredom?  Is there something I'm missing?  Is it some super-fun thing?

Actually, don't answer there.  I guess my main point is this - I don't care about fantasy football and I am amazed that this many people out there, for some reason, do.  I guess that is all.

Advice

So there are some people in this world who like to ask my advice.

I think it's cause I tell it like it is. 

That being said, I rarely like hear others' advice.  I think it's a combo of a) some people have a tendency to give me unrequested advice 2) most people aren't as honest/straightforward as I am, or just don't look at things with the same perspective and have the same priorities as I do and iii) I am stubborn.   Therefore, I never really 'receive' advice, at least not advice that I take - even when I occasionally ask for it.  

Is it me?  (Don't answer that, that's unwanted advice.)

Sigh.  Hmm.  Maybe I'll just invest in one of these 'therapist style' couches and work as an independent contractor if all else fails.

Something I Wish I Knew More About...

...web design, computers, technology, html (whatever that is), C++ (again), javascript (i like coffee), programming, etc.  Is there anywhere in the Chicagoland area to take a class on this?  Just basic stuff.  You know, like 'for dummies', if you will?  I have tried to research this matter and I've been unsuccessful in my findings (some might suggest I would need a class in researching matters on the internet, but those who know me decently might disagree).  Can anyone help?

So You Think You Can Dance Tour

I'm going this Tuesday.  Thanks Kellie!

This Reminds Me....

...my favorite academic (or, perhaps, 'boring') book:

Read it; it's a good one.

I got it my senior year of college for an advertising class.  I liked it so much, I didn't sell it back during book buy-back week, probably much to my parents' chagrin.  Mom & Dad, I owe you $8.

Just For the Record.

I am reading this book.

My coworker foisted it on me.  So far, I like it better than the previous one.

Another Hypothetical Question

Recently - I had a close friend ask me, before introducing me to her new boyfriend, to be completely and totally honest with her about my opinion of him.

Ok - question - when the opinion is negative  (not necessarily specific to this circumstance, but hypothetically speaking) - what CAN be done?  Can a person EVER tell a friend she doesn't like the boyfriend or girlfriend without doing anything but damaging the friendship?

That being said - I can honestly say I've sat and watched several friends date people who, at the very least, did not treat said friends the way they deserved.  I've almost always kept my mouth shut.  Why?  Because of the reason stated in the former paragraph.  Said friend would just push me away, future situations with said friend and bf would be uncomfortable, said friend would begin to censor the significant other's bad behavior, etc.

That being said - I'd like to think if I was in an unhealthy relationship, my friends wouldn't stand idly by and turn a blind eye.  I also know that if I were to date someone and a friend made a disparaging remark about the individual, I would be annoyed based on the fact that I'd witnessed said friend put up with someone less than ideal, so there'd be a hypocrisy factor involved.

What should be done in these situations?  Your thoughts?

Dowding.

Great work, Tricia!!

Honest

Random question:

If someone isn't being honest with you, and you know this person isn't being honest with you, is there anything you can do?  I have tried calling people out on it, historically speaking, but it has never seemed to do anything good.  What does one do in this situation?  I really don't know.

There's A Problem

I think Camille's might have closed.  The location in downtown Chicago.  It was one of my favorite lunch spots.  I loved their wraps and chips.  Something different.  And delicious.  Yet another restaurant I like closed.  File this with Caliente on Sheffield and Mambo Grill.

Sigh.

I think I have a party in mind to blame.

Expressions I Hate - the Series Continues

Epic Fail.

Dude, your forgetting to do your laundry is not EPIC.  Apparently, nowadays, there are like 10 'epic' events a day.  All negative, too, apparently.  There are so many 'epic fails', yet we, as a people, seem to keep bouncing on back.  It really speaks volumes about our resilience.

I predict this expression will be gone in six months.  I can only hope.  I find it of epic annoyance.

Internet Presence

So recently, I have been asked about my 'internet presence'.

Present.

I facebook.  I tweet.  I blog.

Anyhow.  I personally DON'T have many privacy settings.  They are fine for someone else.  But I have nothing to hide.  I kind of think people are too sensitive.  And too nosy.  And I don't personally believe I should I have to hide the fact that I have opinions or the fact that I occasionally like to go out and have fun because of other's super sensitivities.  Just sayin'.

Engagements.

So recently, one of my good friends got engaged.  I am very happy for her - her fiance is a very nice, respectful person.  She is excited to register.

Let me revisit this one.  Why can't I, or others, pull this one?

Hi.  It's Carrie Bradshaw.  I wanted to let you know that I'm getting married.  To myself.  Oh, and I'm registered at Manolo Blahnik.  So thanks.  Bye!

Why not?

My Favorite Perfume

Angel by Thierry.

Thierry also makes another perfume - it's called Alien.  I'm really wondering how this passed through the focus groups.  Who came up with this idea for a name?  Who agreed that this is was a good idea?  What smell is associate with an alien?  Is it a good one?  Apparently someone thought so.  

I have smelled said perfume.  It smelled nice.  Not as nice as Angel.  But nice.  

At the Movies...

So, as I stated earlier, I am really not much of a movie person.  I have to really want to see the movie to go - otherwise it seems like a waste of time and money.  You can't really talk to the people you supposedly want to talk to.  The chairs aren't THAT comfortable.   That, and I guess I have really high standards for movies - so many of them grate on me.  I usually hate stupid romantic comedies.

While I've been sitting here thinking - there are a LOT of movies that I've hated.  I've been trying to think of the WORST movie I've ever seen.  The other day, a winner came to mind....

The Crossroads.

Check it out.  Actually, don't.  Kim Catrall's cameo is far and away the highlight.