An Online Dating Follow-Up

So a while back, I wrote this post.  A cliff notes version:  I a(n) (unbeknownst to me at the time) creepy guy online.  He winked, I winked back, he emailed.  I signed on, read the email, then figured I'd write him back the next day.  He then sent me a nasty email for not responding to him email right away.

Anyhow.  I think I might have also mentioned that I kept seeing him on the site, but under a different name.  I wondered if he had multiple accounts going.  Or, more realistically, if he kept getting reported for a concern, then creating a new account.

Well, it has happened.  His picture, under a new name (for those unfamiliar with how this online dating world works - one cannot change his/her name once it's been created, a whole new account needs to be created) has 'winked' at me.  Does he not recognize me? (Not that I think I'm that memorable, but he sure was upset at my actions.)  Is he going for some kind of reaction?  Is he simply there to harass people?  Am I reading too much into it and he just has no idea he's spoken to me before - he's just 'innocently' expressing interest?

Anyhow.  All I have to say is online dating has been an adventure.  I'm glad I've gained so many stories over the years.

It Happened Again.

Message #1

Hi there! How are you? So...what can I do to
get your attention? I want to explore every
avenue. Is there something that I can do
thats sure to put a smile on your face? If
there is, let me know, cuz I love it! Its one of
the cutest smiles ever!

Michael

Message #2

I sent you a message way back in December, around Christmas. I never heard back from you, so hopefully youre close to saying hello! I can feel it! Maybe youre at least kinda close! LOL! Dont fight it woman! Its dangerous to deny your self conscious. ;-)

Mike 

Message #3

Hi there! How are you? So...what can I do to
get your attention this time around? I want
to explore every avenue. Is there something,
please let me know, cuz I have tried to get your
attention once before and failed. By the way...you
have one of the cutest smiles ever!

Michael

WHAT is with guys doing this?  Btw, it happens on OKcupid.  Which I'm really not proud of.   As I mentioned before, there's other instances of it.  Do these guys think girls are gonna cave?  Are they all working in sales?  Do guys have success with this method?  Does this happen on any other dating sites?  I'd ask if other girls have had this experience, but I know they have from conversations re:this site.  Do girls do this to guys?  (mass repeatedly message without response)  And what, exactly, is his definition of 'self conscious'? (SIC)

An Official Mark Of Shame....

....if you can successfully correctly identify this logo.  Just sayin'.

AutoRenewals

Recently, I got an offer for 'try linkedin premium for free'.  I noticed in the fine print that it appears that this is one of those 'you will be autorenewed and your credit card will be automatically charged unless you go out of your way to opt out in advance' deals.  I know, ahem, some online dating sites I use are like that.  I also remember I had a free trial of amazon prime that did something of that nature - I wrote an email voicing my discontent & received a refund.  Also, recently, a friend of mine got a free trial of some vitamins that operates the same way.  

My question - why do companies do this?  I mean, I do get it.  They then get to charge for an extra month of whatever.  They decided the customer relationship continues - it might be an easier way to rope in customers that wouldn't go out of their way to 'opt in', but will let it continue out of laziness/indifference.  However, does anyone LIKE this business practice?  I find it annoying.  I'm guessing most people do.  I know, like I mentioned with amazon, in most instances, annoyed customers can get a refund when they did not want to be renewed and are shocked to discover a random charge on their credit card bill.  And if they cannot, usually the business can get an extra month or so of payment out of said individual, but then they lose the person as a customer for the long-term.  And, generally, I feel most people are annoyed by this practice, so it negatively impacts a customer's view point of the business, even if their pocketbook is not victimized in the end.  

What are your thoughts?  What are the benefits of the 'autorenew and automatically charge after a free trial' (or ending paid subscription)?  Are their any benefits for the customer?  Are there any customers out there that like this business practice?  

Name Spellings

So my good friend Ellen sent me this article that I found interesting - 13 signs that he'll be a bad partner.

I can't help but notice #8, which is near and dear to me.  I have a name that often gets misspelled.

There was a guy I went out with a handful of times a couple months ago.  He misspelled my name a couple of times in email/text, etc.  I definitely gave him my name (and spelled it correctly, obviously).  Needless to say, it didn't work out.

I am currently talking to someone I may go out with.  We have been texting.  You guessed it - he is spelling my name wrong.  Should I hold it against him?

Here's my thought - these people, in theory, are trying to put their best face forward.  Is this like a person applying for a job, but spelling the hiring manager, or even worse, the company's name wrong?  Is this what one wants from someone who is 'trying his best'?  Am I just being sensitive?  Should one date a person who spells her name wrong?  Your thoughts?

Online Dating Debacles, Take 856

Message #1

(I cannot locate it, but I assume it exists, based on message #2.  And the one thing I remember is I only deleted the REALLY bad ones.)

Message #2

Hi, 

I've attempted messaging you in the past, yet these sites are replete with immaturity and mailboxes are commonly filled with puerile innuendoes. The filtration process can be rather time consuming! 

Have you met any interesting people yet?


Message #3


Good morning, 

I've recently sent you a message. 
Did you receive it? 


I have not replied once.  Let's see how long he keeps going....  If there ends up being more, I will surely update you dear readers.  


Perhaps I shall do a post on the phenomenon of those who repeatedly message the same people on online dating sites without response.  They're out there.  


P.S.  Someone please comment on his vocabulary.

The Silent Treatment, Part 2

So earlier today in cosmo (my bible, as Jay Leno would say), I read an article about what to do when one's man gives 'the silent treatment'.

This raised quite a few questions for me.  Do men give the silent treatment?  I just thought they got into bad moods on occasions.  I didn't think they went out of their way to be 'SO not talking to you'.  I thought that was primarily a woman's domain.  Anyhow.

This article went on to address 'the best ways to react to the silent treatment'.  This leads to the ultimate question - what is the best way to handle receiving 'the silent treatment'?  Whenever someone is giving it to me, I have a tendency to completely ignore it because I think it's childish (one should address the problem directly if something is upsetting him/her).  

However, I can think of a time in somewhat recent history when I gave someone the silent treatment (yes, I hear and see the extreme hypocrisy) and it worked out getting the end result I was looking for.  I can also think of a time quite a few years ago when someone I cared about was clearly upset with something to do with me, and, for the reasons stated earlier, I chose to ignore it; and now, said person and I are no longer speaking.

What are your thoughts?  Is the silent treatment effective?  Is it a good means of handling a situation?  Do you use it?  What is the best way to react to the silent treatment?  

Happy Birthday?

Something I always wondered.

How good of a birthday is it if it is spent responding to facebook birthday greetings?

Just wondering.  No judgment.  Been there.

Is Anyone Else Even Trying?

Maybe I should cheer because the home team is on a winning streak?