I Get Out Once in a While....

...to my first Jewish Wedding!!!!

under the Huppa

Rachel & David (the bride & groom, in case that's not self-explanatory)

girls pic! (the humidity hated my hair & makeup)

another girls pic!!

our beautiful centerpiece

the Hava Nagila (I think I'll have this tradition at my wedding)

Some Thoughts on Online Dating.... (or, Undateable, Part 3)

Ok, so my friend Matt, being his astute self, as always, was able to accurately predict the foreshadowing in the previous post, 'debating'....

So, long story short, I tried online dating.  I could start making a bunch of silly excuses to justify my having done this (such as, I have tried and blogged about blind dating, speed dating, etc., so this just completed my repertoire, etc.), but I'm not going to - I will address why not later.

Anyhow.  For those who are curious about dating websites (I won't mention the one I tried, but it's a fairly mainstream one), I've compiled a list of thoughts (mostly complaints - let's be honest) on the matter, in no particular or coherent order:

--In one's profile, the requisite explanation of why one is here (e.g. "I got sick of meeting people in bars").  Here's the thing - everyone you meet on said website is, AHEM, ON SAID WEBSITE (most likely for its intended purpose).  So the ridiculous explanation comes off a little trite, and quite possibly arrogant (you see, there's a reason for me being here, unlike all the other losers).  Bonus demerits if you pretend you somehow got finagled into being on said site (so I lost a bet to one of my buddies....) -- all I really hear is Ross Gellar saying 'Ok, so who should I say tricked me into smoking the pot?'

--I have twice been called either a 'nerd' or a 'dork' by a virtual stranger.  Now THAT's a turn-on.  Who doesn't love a good throwback to the junior high lunch room?  If I saw these men in person, would they pull my hair?  Way to disprove that this means of meeting someone is geared toward the socially stunted.

--Listing sexual activity as a 'must have'.  Ok, I get it.   It's important to you, and shouldn't you be honest about your needs, find someone else who has the same desire, blah blah blah.  But you do realize, you are paying for a service, with hopes that said service connects you with some sexual activity.  You are just one step away from using a pimp.

--Works out five times a week or more.  A little obsessive, don't you think?  Read:  you'll notice if I gain five pounds.  I'd rather date a guy who wouldn't notice if I shaved my head.

--In the 'about me' section:  "Uh, it's hard to describe myself....I never know what to say in these things...uhhh...these things are always awkward".  Yes, they are, but think of it this way - you've had time to think about preparing an answer and THIS is what you came up with?  What are you gonna be like on the date?

--Male, age 30 (or higher).  Looking for women age 18-30.   EW EW EW EW EW.  You could date an 18 year old?!  Seriously?!  I don't know which is worse, a 30+ man who could actually relate to and connect with an 18 year old woman on a mental/emotional level, or a 30+ man who could guiltlessly use one for a couple hook ups.  I can't help you, dude, but maybe a good therapist could.

--(In the body of a message) 'So, I am just looking for some fun things to do in Chicago and was wondering if you had any good suggestions'.  This is the cyber-equivalent of 'do you come here often' or 'you look really familiar'.  I get it, it seems like a nice, pleasant conversation starter, but a small part of it just seems moronic because, again, it's an online dating site, not centerstage.com - is that REALLY what you are contacting me for?   How totally savvy.

--Repeatedly getting contacted by the same guy before any form of a response from me.  I think you know my opinion on this one.

--Height:  5'6" (actual height: 5'4").  Height:  5'9" (actual height: 5'7").  If he's claimed to be anything under 6', you can assume he's added at least two inches to his actual height.  I am not sure the probability of it, exactly, but it's pretty much the same odds that a woman will knock ten pounds off her weight.

--Complaining to me that other women you've met through the site are not as good looking in real life as they are in their pictures.  It rubs me the same way as it would you if I were to complain to you about a man taking me out on a date but not paying.

--A man with a picture of himself holding a baby.  Chicks dig a guy who likes babies.  Clever.  REALLY clever.

--"So sick of meeting people in bars".  If I see this tagline one more f'ing time....  Actually, the painfully ironic thing is men in bars can get a little leeway under the assumption that alcohol is partially responsible for some stupid statements/behavior - what's the excuse here?

I am sure there are more that I cannot think of right now.  I can almost guarantee there'll be a follow-up post or 3.  I can honestly say, after having tried this, that I thought maybe I just hadn't met the right guy.  But I have now come to the conclusion that either a) I am way too critical of the men I meet or b) to the single men of the Chicagoland area - it's not me, it's you.  I'm opting for the latter.

Does Lee DeWyze Have a Girlfriend?

Ok, as of now, I'm hoping to have this be my last Lee DeWyze post for a while so as to move away from the mayhem.  However.

There seem to be quite a few inquiries as to whether or not Lee has a girlfriend.  Well, via my facebook fandom, I have found the answer to this eternal burning question.  Or maybe I found a red herring.  Whatever.  Anyhow.

On Lee's very own blog (!??!  he's a blogger too?!?!), he answers this, amongst many other burning questions (such as food allergies and favorite board games).  I figured I should give my readers what they want.  And maybe, just maybe, Lee will notice I link to him and want to get the conversation started.

Lee DeWyze!!!

WOOHOO American Idol!!!  2010 American Idol!!

Random humor:
--Snafu #1 - Ryan Seacrest's mike going during Kris Allen's singing
--Snafu #2 - One of Simon's rejects talking about how he was having a Kanye moment and taking Simon's job (which would have been fine) with an awkward cut to commercial - was that not intentional?
--Snafu #3 - The idol music randomly coming on, then not going, right before the commercial around 1:45.

Did they not rehearse this?

Random thought - where was David Cook?  Too busy for the show that made him not just some random dude?

Debating....

So, recently, I decided to, well, let's go with 'try something new'.  Most of my good friends/loyal blog readers know about this.  I am not, let's say, embarrassed of trying said activity, however, it's not necessarily something I want to broadcast over the internet.  Especially since I've purposely made myself highly 'googleable' with this blog.

I am sure my most intelligent readers can read between the lines.

Anyhow.

Granted, I did expect some tempting blogging material from this 'social experiment'.  But I did not expect anywhere near this much material.  Or this quality of material.  Better than my wildest dreams.

So, should I open up and blog on this material and put all shame aside?  Should I go public?   Your thoughts?

Send Me Straight Back to Junior High for this one....

(sorry for the terrible quality - it's from a camera phone)

The name of the place is 'The Rockin' Taco' (I have no idea what kind of business this is).  I believe, in the logo, the A is supposed to be a guitar.  However, the name of the business, paired with the outline of the "A"....

I suppose this should be filed under 'really cheap humor'.

Home Decorating - This is a Grown-Up Apartment....

....or at least I like to think so.

I have done some decorating this weekend.

a new vase....

and another - this one was only $7.50.  note the butterfly detailing.

a centerpiece - perfect for an Ikea coffee table

my aquarium is growing!!

Currently Reading....

Really good.   About 40 pages in already.

However (spoiler alert?).

I get picky when there are inconsistencies between a book and a series.  I do realize Candace wrote the first book that started SATC but didn't write every episode from there on out (I assume).  However - in the series, I believe it's Season 4, the episode entitled 'Shoulda Woulda Coulda' - Carrie comments that her dad ran out on her and her mom at age 5 (or sometime around there).  In this book - Carrie is in high school and her dad is still around.

Also, Carrie has siblings in this book.  Nothing was ever said that Carrie had siblings during the entire series.  Granted, there was no mention of family, in general, for her.  I realize that doesn't mean they couldn't have existed, however, with so much focus on her for so long, I feel, if they did exist, they should have been thrown in to a conversation or episode at some point.  I had Carrie pegged as an only like me, for multiple reasons, and I had all the supporting evidence I needed.  Or, at least, no contradictory evidence.  Hmm.  Sigh.

Your thoughts?  Who else is reading this?

Asking a Man Out, Part II

Ok, so since a discussion got started - some follow-up questions on the post:

 Generally speaking, men were raised to believe that if they are interested in a woman, they should ask her out.  However, does this apply to the generation of men, say, 30 and under?  Is this the generation of men who were raised with beliefs that women can make the move?  Did the feminist movement make men second guess this?  Do a lot of men today have experience with women initiating?  That, and do men like getting asked out by women, as my friend suggested?  Or do men prefer to be in the driver's seat?  I realize this varies from guy to guy.  I think a lot of men will initially say something like 'oh, it's AWESOME if a woman makes the first move' - however, in their mind, it's a Jessica Alba-esque woman, not an every day woman who they may or may not be interested in in the first place.  Do any of my male readers (I know I have at least five!) have experience with getting asked out by a woman?  Do they have experience rejecting a woman?

As I always say - your thoughts?

I'm Not Pretending to be a Food Blogger

but....

1)  I am inspired by fellow bloggers (of the food variety) Becky and Laura

2)  I cooked myself a nice dinner.  And, although I thoroughly appreciated it (at least my taste buds and stomach did),  I felt it was too good to keep to myself.  And, it photographed so prettily.

Sigh.

I suppose photographing and posting the dirty dishes and grocery bill from this meal would really complete the picture.

My Lee DeWyze Encounter Back in Mount Prospect (for the Welcome Home Parade Festivities)

Lee in the Q101 booth - he's pretty much dead center in the picture.  Sorry for the poor quality - it's from a camera phone.

That's Lee's head against the window, facing away from the camera (err, phone).

Lee walking through the door out from the Q101 studio (the idol cameramen told us to cheer - ha, like they needed to!)

Kind of a creepy looking pic - I blame the phone.  I tried to get a pic with him, but the idol peeps ushered him off too quickly.  Sigh.

GOOOOOO LEE!

Asking a Man Out....

So Chelsea Handler says (on the subject of asking a man out before he asks you):

Never ask out a guy before he asks you.  I don't care what sore of women's movement feminist crap you hear: it's a big mistake.  men are, for the most part, stupid.  If they have been told their whole lives that it is their place to ask out a woman and you upset that rule and confuse them, their heads will explode.
On top of  that, if they haven't asked you out yet, they're probably not interested.  In that case, they would only say yes if you ask them because they (a) feel sorry for you or (b) assume that you will pay.  In either scenario, you lose.

Now, when I was younger, I may have held a different viewpoint (see previous posts about not wanting to be picked by a man, but rather, to do the picking).

However.   I kind of think one non-negotiable is that a guy must really like me, or at least, be interested enough to ask me out.  If he can't ask me out, he either (a) isn't all that into me, or (b) lacks the balls to ask me out.  As Chelsea said - either way, it's a loss.

Your thoughts?  Should women ask out men?  Should we remain old-fashioned on this one?  Do you other girls out there ask men out?  Do you men enjoy getting asked out by women?  Or, is this question in and of itself too old fashioned?  Should it be 'should women wink/poke/nudge/whatever form of online dating communication effort first'?

I Call Being Frannie (Thanks for the Lead, Courtney)....

Looks like our little "My Boys" star, Jordana Spiro (aka PJ Franklin), has a new show coming up, called
'Love Bites'.

Ok, as long as it doesn't interfere with My Boys (which seems to already be a little late....)

I Own These....

The fact is, sometimes it's really hard to walk in a single woman's shoes. That's why we need really special ones now and then to make the walk a little more fun.  - Carrie Bradshaw, Season 6, 'A Woman's Right to Shoes'

(I have come so far since the Ladybug shoes (featured on April 5, 2010).)

LEE DEWYZE IN MOUNT PROSPECT FOR THE PARADE!!

Ok, so in the comment section in a previous post, I stated that I'd be live-blogging from the Lee DeWyze (is it Dewyze or DeWyze?) hometown parade in Mount Prospect.

I lied.  Well, not intentionally.  But I didn't realize it'd be on a Friday (not a Saturday) and there were some other factors.  There'd be no way for me to get back downtown from MP with all that mayhem in time for Friday night festivities, and, let's face it, this girl has a lot going on.

Anyhow.

Well, Lee has quite a lot going on as well.  And one of the activities on his roster for the day was an interview with the Q101 morning radio show, which is in MY WORK BUILDING.

I think you know where this is going.  I stopped by outside, I took pics on my camera phone (I finally know the purpose of a camera phone), and (hopefully) got my mug on camera for something somewhere (???), and, more importantly, was a mere two feet from LEE DEWYZE.  He seemed very sweet, very laid back and very unaffected by his sudden burst of fame and fandom.  He had a huge smile and said what seemed to be a very sincere, excited 'you guys are great!' to the crowd, took a couple quick pics, said a quick apology for not being able to take more pics, and was ushered off quickly to the next event.

He was great!  I have pictures to prove this event - they will be coming shortly, as soon as I can figure out how to get them off the phone and onto the blog.  Here's hoping for the best....

Belly Button Ring

I have been so preoccupied lately that I completely and totally forgot that the anniversary of my belly button piercing passed.

I have now had said piercing since freshman year of college - I got it around October-ish.  It was one of the first things I did as a college freshman.

Anyhow.  At the time, I was super-excited about it.  Now, don't get me wrong, I still love it, but I have been thinking....  I, like most 20 somethings, do not walk around in belly-baring clothes.  In fact, I think the last time I wore a belly-baring shirt, I was 13 (pre-piercing).  So, the only time anyone sees this bad boy is 1) if I'm wearing a bathing suit or b) well, you get this gist....

That brings me to my next question - is there a point to it, then?  Granted, I don't plan on taking it out, and I don't think it would even heal at this point, but again, is there a point?  Does this go with all unseen piercings/tattoos?   Your thoughts?

I Will Vouch for the 'Party' Part....

I will not comment.

The Guy Who Won't Give Up on You....

Ok, I thought of a dating/relationship/man post I wanted to write - woohoo!!!!

So a friend of mine and I were talking about the proverbial guy who asks one out multiple times after having been rejected.  I remember, back in college, one of my close friends saying her father had asked out her mother several times and had been rejected, and well, they obviously somehow ended up together.

I also remember this being mentioned on Eric & Kathy one morning recently - with the follow up question being 'how come when it happens in movies, women find it charming and endearing, whereas in real life they find it creepy'?  (Editor's sidenote:  Seeing that said man is being played by Hugh Grant or Matthew McConaughey is a very large factor.)

A friend of mine took the stance that she finds this sweet and charming - someone who has been rejected but keeps coming back for more must really want you and really be willing to fight for YOU specifically, as opposed to someone who just wants someone.  This is clearly someone who cares a lot and won't just up and leave you at the first sign of things being less than perfect.

I, however, have a different stance.  I find it to be a turnoff to borderline creepy (depending on the harmlessness of the individual).  As I see it, I would rather have someone who wants me to be happy, even if it is not with him, than one who wants to have me as his own, per se.  To me, someone who keeps coming back after I were to say no isn't respecting what I want, but rather, just thinking of what he wants - that, and I feel like this is a theme that might then keep resurfacing in the relationship, if that were to happen.  He wants something one way; I don't, but he keeps being persistent about having his way as opposed to thinking of my feelings.  For me, any guy who asks me out and is a 'soft no' would quickly become a hard, definite no if he asked me out a second time.

Your thoughts on the guy who won't give up on you?   Turn on?  Turn off?

The Scrunchie

Ok - who remembers the scrunchie?!

Today a good friend of mine brought up the subject of the scrunchie, and the fact that she used to make them.  OMG, ME TOO.

That, and I seriously loved scrunchies.  The odd, complex thing about it, though, was I didn't like the way my hair looked up in them.  But I liked them.  I liked the fancy beautiful hair decorations.  It just didn't work when I tried to wear them.  Quite a conundrum.

Anyhow.  The scrunchie is now out.   As in, out of style.  It is so officially out of style, it was even mentioned as being out on Sex and the City years ago (when her toolish ex-boyfriend Jack Berger who was so much hotter as Peter Gibbons foolishly states that a New York woman might wear one and Carrie immediately corrects it).

Will the scrunchie come back?  Will it be revived?  Can it come back from the aforementioned PR disaster?  (If so, then what about banana clips?)  Are there closet scrunchie enthusiasts out there?  Is it a secret cult classic (like, say, "My So-Called Life")?  Who coined the term 'scrunchie'?  When was the last time, you, reader, saw someone wearing one?

Random Question

Does ANYBODY really keep secrets?  What constitutes keeping a secret?  Well, in my book - keeping a secret means NOT TELLING ANYONE.  At all.  Ever.

However, does anyone do this?  Is it ok to tell someone who is seemingly inconsequential?  For example, if I tell a non-work friend a work secret - does it matter?  Is that ok?  Does that make me still trustworthy?  Is this less harmless?  Granted, I can think of times I've been on the receiving end of such information from a close party about someone I hardly know, such as a coworker or a non-mutual friend.  I feel like there are some strangers out there I know some deeply personal information about.  And consequently, there might be strangers out there who know deeply personal things about me.

On the strict interpretation that keeping a secret means not telling anyone - does ANYONE out there do that?  I know that most people I know have told me something under the contingency of 'but you don't know this'.  In fact, I think all people I know have told me such a thing.  And I admit, at times, I have been guilty of the same.

I can also think of several times I have been told something, then asked not to repeat, to which I didn't necessarily agree.  Is this info fair game to repeat?

I am just wondering if there is anyone out there who has never ever let anything out of the vault.  Also, is keeping something completely and totally in the vault even a realistic expectation?

Editor's sidenote:  No personal secrets will be revealed on said blog.  Please stop panicking (or getting excited), readers.

Tattoos

(Editor's Sidenote:  I have no clue who this person is.)

So, I recently discovered that one of my facebook friends is getting an entire tattoo sleeve.  

Now, I have mixed feelings on tattoos.  I've thought about getting one, but then, I can't decide what I would want to get and where.  And then I start to think that if I'm just picking something for the sake of picking something, it doesn't mean that much to me, so it's not worth tattooing on my body.  Hmm.  

However, I must say - I sometimes find tattoos on a guy to be HOT.  Not the physical look of the tattoo, per se, but the alternative anti-authority rebeliousness aspect of them.  (Not the angry biker style guy, but the alternative chill-style guy.)  However, I think since tattoos have become so mainstream, they may have lost that effect.  

I do kind of view tattoos as a form of self-expression.  I am still debating on getting one.  Maybe I'll get this blog's url....  Your thoughts?  Your feelings on tattoos?  

Posts

So a couple of my good friends/loyal blog readers have commented to me in person that I have not had one of my relationship rants/discussions in quite a while.

Well, let's see.  I've covered so much - speed-dating, online dating, living together before marriage, how to propose, where to meet someone, how to break up with someone (it does not involve a post-it), unrequited love, settling for mr. good enough, how to handle it when one doesn't like her friend's significant other, the list goes on and on.

I think I've simply run out of material.

Or have I?  Any suggestions, my readers?  These are the meaty posts that I like to write the best.  I guess nothing's come to mind for me on this subject in quite a while.  Any thoughts?

Please give me a lead.  You can lead a horse to water; I just may drink.   Especially if the water is disguised as coffee, cherry coke, or riesling.

Greek-Style Gladiator Sandals

So, what does everyone think of these Greek 'gladiator-style' sandals?  They have become extremely popular for the summer, it seems.  My feelings toward them are similar to my initial feelings toward blue nail polish (I am now in the market for a second bottle).

Will I come around on these?  Should I?  My readers thoughts?